Have permit, don't carry. Discussion?

Acquired permit almost 5 years ago (coming up on renewal time for me, which I will definitely do). For the first 6 months or so I carried whenever I got the chance - though this did not include at work because my employer has a no firearms policy, limiting carry time. Then it was more of a "sometimes" thing. And then maybe only if I went to certain "sketchy" areas. The last time I carried was probably 2 years ago at least, maybe 3.One of the main reasons (I think) I stopped carrying was/is I was of afraid of printing or someone else seeing the gun. I was constantly aware (perhaps hyperaware, and maybe that's a good thing) that I was carrying and just never felt I could relax. That and just comfort issues - though I don't know I was able to give myself enough time to really get used to it.But back to my concerns about others seeing my weapon - my logic is that being sort of paranoid all the time and carrying a gun are not a good mix. I'm read here and other places constantly that as noticeable as some of us we think we may be, no one notices the concealed weapon. I've never "made" somone else concealing, and I've looked - like seriously made an effort to try time and again. Once, only once in my life I saw a guy open carry at a restaurant about 3-4 years ago and no one said a thing. But that fear is still there. I live in a relatively liberal state, in a very liberal city, in an EXTREMELY liberal neighborhood. The whole soccer mom crying wolf while I'm at the grocery store is the scenario that most concerns me.I'm not entirely sure why I'm posting thins - maybe it's a confession of sorts. Maybe I want you to try to talk me into carrying again. Or, I don't know... And of course it's all about personal choice. I think maybe I feel bad about having the ability to carry but am choosing not to - like I'm somehow letting someone down or something. via /r/CCW http://ift.tt/2jhSEaG