Thursday, May 5, 2016

Incident today and wanted some feedback. WALL O' TEXT ALERT


DISCLAIMER: I don't want this to be a circle jerk of what you think of me, I want clear and concise questions/ answers/ arguments/ suggestionsCharacters: Me (21 M) 6'0 180lbs , Psycho (20s M) 6'2 180ish lbs, Mika (21 F)Background: State is Alabama. I've been carrying for a year and couple months now. Both concealed and open. I have been good friends with Mika for 3 years now, we have classes together, I'm friends with her brother. Now on to pertinent info for the incident today. Mika dated psycho for 8 months, all of which were abusive to different degrees. Mental, emotional, threat of physical. She finally broke up with him and ever since has been stalked, harassed, and threatened. She has applied for a Protection from Abuse Order for DV and Harassing Communication that has yet to be signed by the judge. She has communicated to him that she is blocking him and to not contact her or show up to her residence. Psycho has created multiple different social media accounts to contact her and likes to play a game where he shows up to different locations that she's at. So this isn't even half of it but I think I've painted a pretty clear picture of the context that we are in.Incident: We finish our final and go get some breakfast, she has recently purchased a S&W bodyguard and show's me her targets from practice... she sucks lol. So I suggest we go shooting to work on her skills. Great, go to the range, have a good time, she makes good improvement now that she's not just using the laser as her sight -_- Now at this time I am open carrying ( I know I know this is CCW, but I like you guys more and concealed becomes an issue later in the story so no rules broken.) because we were on the range and it's more comfortable. As we pull into her complex right past her front door, low and behold Psycho is there! He see's Mika and I in the car and as I swing left into the parking spot he starts making his way towards my driver side door. I jam the car in park, tell Mika to call the cops, and get out immediately because if there's one place I don't want to be when Psycho comes up its in the car with my seatbelt tangling me up and him very angry and jealous. At this point, there is no route to escape without reversing through him and maneuvering in a tight parking lot, so I pick my battle as best I can. I step out and tell him he's not welcome here and to not come any closer. He stops and starts angrily questioning/ berating me. I tell him I don't have any answers for him and that he needs to leave, again he's not welcome. Then he starts threatening me saying he's going to beat my ass, and starts closing distance. I blade my body and put my hand on my gun and tell him not to take another fucking step towards me. At this point my thought process isn't really to seem tough or to threaten shooting him by putting my hand on my gun but to retain my weapon in case of a physical altercation, which is imminent at this point in my mind, because my holster has no retention besides friction. He notices now that I have a firearm and starts calling me a pussy, he'll beat my ass yada yada yada; again tell him that's fine but not to take another fucking step towards me, he takes a bluff plant step towards me and I take a step back repeating myself. I tell him to sit down on the ground because the cops are on the way. He hears that, knows he's been warned, cops already know about this situation and he splits. Great fuck him my life is easier now that some crazy asshole isn't trying to beat me up when I have a gun. I flip my shirt over my gun to conceal it so to not freak the cops out when they get here. Cruiser pulls up, cop steps out; I put my hands up near my chest palms facing him, stating I am not the ex boyfriend but I am carrying my firearm and have my permit. Give them to him, he disarms me and puts it in my car for me while he takes reports etc.My thoughts: If you've made it this far, congrats and thank you for taking the time to read this.During this incident there was some serious adrenaline pumping, I really try to visualize myself in these situations in order to mentally prepare but nothing compares to when you actually have to do it, and hell I didn't even clear my holster. But I shook my underwear out, tried to keep my leg on the ground and not shaking like a twig, and used my best big boy voice.Fist fights are one thing, yes serious bodily harm can come from them but you know, its fists. If I didn't have my gun and he came after me I would have no problem fighting him, avoid at all costs yes, but some people don't afford you that luxury. After the fact, I was thinking about how it would play out if he really did come at me. I think at first I would have tried to maintain retention and fight him off, but at that point the fight is no longer between two people, its between two people with a gun and I have to win that fight at all costs. I went back and looked at my states deadly force laws and to my understanding (IANAL) I would have been justified. I'm glad it didn't come to that but it's a scary thought when you know you have the responsibility of a firearm and someone is leaving you very few options.I feel as if I did a good job of de-escalating the situation. Did I use inflammatory language? Yea maybe that rilled it up a little but I wanted to make my commands clear and serious. I could have just whipped my pistol out and leveled it at him but I don't think that would have been very good.Definitely going to look into getting a holster with retention for my pistol, unfortunately it's a harder model to come up on holsters for but it will be a high priority.After about the 3rd phone call with my dad later on about this incident he basically told me that this wasn't my fight; and he may have been speaking for future run-ins, maybe I didn't pick up on his context due to the beers I was having. But I feel in this incident I did the right thing. In no way was I trying to be a hero. That's not my job. I carry to protect myself and those I love. I assessed every option I had as in escape or other and this was the only feasible option. We had a right to be there, he did not, and no one deserves to be tormented by some raging Psycho, looking over their shoulder every second of the day.So hit me with it. via /r/CCW http://ift.tt/1NYymzq

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