I am german and this is about germany. I write in english for others knowing german jurisdiction or the european situation to contribute aswell. For americans: we cannot get guns easily.
Most people being bullied in the past are being recommended to take martial arts / self defense lessons.
IME, in every single self defense lesson you are being told to run away, if possible. Running away might save your life, but it also reinforces the belief that you cannot handle a physical encounter and that your self defense class is just gymnastics. Given that police is never of any help, because they want evidence that you don't have, you have no way to counter abusive behaviour.
This is trauma after trauma. Even behavioural therapists say: repeat a traumatic situation and end it in a good way that empowers you. "I will die and therefore I run away" is everything but empowering, sorry to break it to you.
I have always had a beef with the statement "run away" and now I understood why. Because it reinforces helplessness. Also, it reinforces the belief of inability to defend yourself, which made you a victim of bullying in the first place; if you should always run away if you can, probably the techniques don't work.
Now, maybe the techniques do work, but the "always run away" statement neither helps you deal with trauma nor does it empower you. Therefore the question is, what a better replacement is.
PS: I will ignore every post defending the "always run away if you can" statement
Submitted September 29, 2019 at 09:03PM by unrealnihilist https://ift.tt/2maLo69
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