How to deal with the "burden of defense"

Had a close call at work today, really upset me because I cannot carry per policy, and I never know when I will be crawling around in machinery where a gun might be an issue.My wife doesn't understand Why I would be willing to risk being fired to carry. She thinks I am crazy. She won't get a ccw and won't practice with the shotgun she keeps unloaded. All the responsibility for keeping us safe lies on my shoulders.I live in CA so I am always under attack and have to listen to our BS media. I am just so fucking tired of people not understanding why you would want to be able to defend yourself. I feel upset about it more often then not. How do I cope? via /r/CCW http://ift.tt/1RrypDB